going to the chapel....

The inevitable question from close friends was: WHY?

I am 61 years old. I am a serial groom. And a few days ago I got engaged to get married again – after telling friends and former wives that I would never do it again.

Now I am going to. I got hit by the “love truck”.  Her name is Chanel Hayton. She is a woman who has never been married before and vowed she never would be.

In fact, on our first dinner date she said: “I will never get married. I will never have children. And I can’t cook”.

I told her she had left one thing out. I said: “I will never live with you.” And I won’t.  We secretly got engaged at Riva at the St. Kilda Marina this time last week. And I am as happy as a pig in mud.

Last week a columnist e-mailed me to say that the latest “roaring wildfire whisper” was that I was going to marry a “six foot temptress”.

The rumour was true. I did tell her, before our photo appeared in yesterday’s Herald Sun, that I was glad it was Cup Week. Because alongside her I looked like a jockey.

 Being a person who desperately shuns the spotlight, she begged me to elope in Las Vegas. That won’t happen. We shall get married at Willows in February or March. And she IS a gorgeous temptress. I can’t believe I would do this again but I fell in love. I fell in love. We shan’t live together. We will keep separate apartments. It’s like you are permanently dating. Which aint bad. In fact it is beautiful. When we go away to Sydney or Mt Macedon for the weekend I always book two suites. To put it in blokey terms we each have our own “ little poo pan”.

I am excited -- although one of Chanel’s main traits is that she actually makes me feel tranquil. Tranquil. An old-fashioned word in these frantic days. Makes me feel tranquil. And very, very happy. And, as I said on 3AW on Friday: I am a very, very lucky old fart.

So why do it? Again. Fidelity is one reason. I want to commit myself totally to one woman.  I want to share her life. I want to be – as I told her – her “safe haven”.

I make no claims to having been a saint. And if you read Jacki Weaver’s new book called “Much Love Jac” you’ll agree. But to meet a woman, who unexpectedly, brings peace and love to your often turbulent life is a wonderment.

To be honest, I can’t believe I am actually organising and running this wedding. I told Chanel that this is your first and last wedding. She didn’t even want to wear a dress. This will sound more dominant than it is but I have started designing and organising her dress. I have organised her bridesmaids. My best man and groomsman. The celebrant. The location. The lot. The musicians – Michael and Stockton from Eden on the Park and my mate Peter Sullivan and his sons. There’ll be beautiful sounds and beautiful people.

And if that makes ME sound like a mushbucket then so be it.

Much has been made of the fact that I have been married a number of times before. And that is true. But none of those marriages --or a special engagement – were failures. My first wife Lana Wells –a former Women’s Editor of the Melbourne Herald—and I were together for seven years. My second wife, Eve, an American flight attendant, were together for four years in the US and here and Jacki Weaver and I were together for more than fifteen years.

I don’t go into relationships lightly. They fold because you grow apart or you just grown differently. When I did “ This Is Your Life” all three wives and fiancée Lynda Stoner came out hand in hand and said nicer things about me than they probably should have. And then we all went to dinner.

This new commitment, in my mind, is my last. My grandma lived to 97. My Dad is 88. I reckon I’ve got about another 25 years and I want to spend them with Chanel. I love her.

November 6, 2005

©Copyright Derryn Hinch 2005