a working class man

There is a story in the news today that reminds me of an old tale. A husband retires and starts getting under his wife’s feet. Starts suggesting how to do things that she has been doing around the house for decades. Without his interference or input.

Finally she throws him out of the kitchen with the telling quote: “I married you for life, not for lunch”.

I thought of that today when I read about a new survey with the acronym of HILDA. It actually bears the lofty title “Household Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia”.

And it shows that Australian women not only hate the idea of their spouses being under the feet and in their way when they retire, they also don’t like the idea of their husbands working part-time.

Part of it is obviously financial but part of it is social. Australian women, even those who work full-time or part-time, want their husbands to be the main full-time breadwinner. They still believe in the traditional structure. The “hunter gatherer” syndrome.

Luckily, for family harmony, most men agree. They want to work full-time. They don’t mind if their wife works full-time, part-time or not at all. The male career is still very important. And usually satisfying. The pay is usually higher even though the hours are almost always longer.

And even working mothers get to spend more time with the kids than Dad does. Of course there is a touch of Harry Chapin’s Cat’s in the Cradle here where Dad rarely has time to indulge the children and enjoy them growing up.

This doesn’t include the still rare role-reversal cases of house husbands.

But I’ll take a punt. I think women, who work part-time or stay at home, are happy to get the hubbie out of the house. In my early years Mum would kiss Dad goodbye in the morning and was happy to do the things she had to do around the house by herself. Setting own schedule. Making her own lunch when wanted to.

My father would often go back to work at night and for years I thought every family had dinner at 5 o’clock.

Weekends was when we spent time as a family. Helping the old man cut the lawns or trim the hedges or make things with him in the shed.

And by Monday I am sure Mum was pleased to see the back of him again.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

©Copyright Derryn Hinch 2005