time's up, girt

Barry Humphries – and his alter ego  Dame Edna Everage – are in the news for several reasons today.

Humphries,and the Dame, have been named by Australia Post as their 2006 Australian Legend. And they have put out five fifty-cent stamps featuring various stages of the actor’s career. Going way back to Mrs Norm Everadge in  1969.

Humphries is also in  the news because he has demanded that Australia get a new national anthem.  He says: “The current anthem is unlearnable. Nobody knows the words. You have ordinary members of the public trying to mouth the words while standing still. They always look very, very embarassing.”

And to a degree, I agree. Most of our sporting stars don’t even attempt to sing it. And it is such a high register that a lot of people find it unsingable.

And the words. They are ancient and not applicable. It was an improvement when they changed them from “Australia’s sons” to

“Australians all”. But who the hell is girt? “Our home is girt by sea.”

Humphries also knocks Waltzing Matilda. He calls it a “nonsense song”. It’s not. It’s the most recognised Aussie in the world, But maybe we could take the internationally recognised music and put new lyrics to it for an anthem.

I mean, the song that the talented Paul Kelly has written for the Commonwealth Games is rubbish to me.

He writes: “Tonight our fires are burning all across the plain. Above us stars are shining we may never see again. Our captain walks among us with a soft word here and there. How rich our thin gruel tastes tonight  how sweet each breath of air”.

What sort of sporting anthem is that? It’s crap.

Anyway, back to the national anthem. Should there be a new one? Any suggestions?  96 96 1278

Friday, January, 20, 2006

©Copyright Derryn Hinch 2006