THE STAFF OF LIFE

In recent months I have not bought a loaf of bread at the supermarket. Used to buy sourdough and store it in the freezer.

 

I haven’t bought any—not because I don’t eat it any more while on some fad diet. I haven’t bought any because I daily make my own. And take a crusty loaf, still warm, to my radio station and feed it to my producers and reporters in the news room.

 

And it is fantastic. They jump on it like seagulls on a piece of hot fat. That’s when I am not playing Mrs Doubtfire and baking them chocolate and fudge muffins.

 

But back to the bread. I no longer buy commercial bread. Bake it all myself daily in the Sunbeam breadmaker. You know exactly what is in it. I’ve heard the rumours that hamburger buns in fast food places are loaded with sugar. Maybe that is true. I know that in a loaf of Hinch bread there is less than a teaspoon of sugar. Less than half a teaspoon of salt. A couple of teaspoons of skim milk powder.

 

There are a couple of cups of flour. One cup of water. Two teaspoons of margarine. Some cracked pepper. A handful of shredded  tasty cheese. And I throw in a few sultanas as well.

 

I’ll admit I get reckless in the kitchen. I use reliable Laucke bread machine pre-mix” for “crusty white bread” but their lectures about making perfect bread scare me.

 

Try this bit of blurb off one of their bags of flour.

 

“4 cups of crusty white breadmix at 160g  per cup will weigh 640g. This 640 multiplied by the water ratio of 0.69 results in 440ml of water required. Decrease the yeast by ¼ teaspoon to reduce the potential in loaf size.”

 

Hang on a flash. All I am trying to do here is bake a loaf of bread here.

 

Their instructions are so wordy and pompous. Although they do say

 “ don’t be afraid to experiment”. I did. Believe me – anchovy bread is a disaster. Black olive bread isn’t that wonderful either.

 

But cracked pepper and sultanas and shredded cheese aint that bad. At least the 3AW news room loves it. Daily.

 

That’s when I don’t bake them muffins.